Ruhanya Chops Ice Cream With Mandelarists | HOURLY CARTOON
8 July 2025
By Farai D Hove
🎙️ “Ruhanya Chops Ice Cream with the Mandelarists of the Obsolete Long Gone Tricks That Will Never Work”
They say the revolution must be organised.
Structures.
Strategies.
Command lines.
But there he is…
Ruhanya.
A man of yesteryear blueprints,
Chopping ice cream on a stranded bus with no wheels.
No wheels.
Not even a rim to hope on.
And yet he’s consumed —
Consumed with the obsession of structure.
He demands order from a broken shell,
Blueprints for a bus that ain’t moved in years,
Screaming for motion,
But standing on bricks.
“Ruhanya ndiye driver mutsva!”
They shout.
But where’s he driving to?
The tyres are gone.
The fuel is propaganda.
And the engine…
That was stolen in 2008,
Buried under dead manifestos and dried ink from a thousand press conferences.
And still —
He eats.
Chops ice cream with the Mandelarists.
Those custodians of obsolete gospel.
Preachers of struggle in Versace socks.
Scribes of slogans etched in expired ink.
They sit in that yellow bus,
Parked by history’s pothole,
Talking “structure”
Like it’s a resurrection chant.
They say: “Let’s build again!”
But the people…
The people have moved on.
The crowd outside is wide awake.
They’ve seen the rust.
They know a stuck bus when they smell it.
And so we ask:
How do you demand movement from statues?
How do you design order on a foundation of decay?
Ruhanya’s still drawing roadmaps
On the back of yesterday’s press cuttings,
Still asking why the fuel won’t burn,
As he pours old ideologies into an empty tank.
This is not nostalgia.
This is necromancy.
And the people…
The people will no longer clap for ghosts.
So let the cones melt.
Let the bricks sink.
Let the crowd chant truth beyond slogans.
Because ice cream doesn’t build nations.
And speeches won’t move broken buses.
(
“Tisataure mazita…”
But you already know who’s wasting your time.