Retirement Package Proposal for President Emmerson Mnangagwa.
By Farai D Hove
The Southern African Development Community (SADC) recognizes the valuable contributions made by President Emmerson Mnangagwa to the development and peace of the region during his tenure in office. In recognition of his service, SADC proposes the following retirement package:
- Immunity from prosecution: President Mnangagwa shall be granted immunity from prosecution for any acts or omissions committed during his tenure in office. This immunity shall extend to both domestic and international courts.
- Full salary USD4,000 per month for life: President Mnangagwa shall be paid a full salary of USD4,000 per month for life. This salary shall be paid by the government of Zimbabwe.
- 20 bodyguards for life paid for by the government: President Mnangagwa shall be assigned 20 bodyguards for life. These bodyguards shall be paid by the government of Zimbabwe.
- Parliamentary Act of Law Protecting him from media and social media ridicule for life: SADC shall use its best efforts to facilitate the passage of a Parliamentary Act of Law in Zimbabwe that protects President Mnangagwa from media and social media ridicule for life.
SADC believes that the proposed retirement package is fair and reasonable. President Mnangagwa has served Zimbabwe with distinction, and he deserves to be able to enjoy his retirement in peace and security. The immunity from prosecution is necessary to protect him from politically motivated charges. The full salary and bodyguards are necessary to ensure that he can live comfortably and safely. The Parliamentary Act of Law is necessary to protect him from the media and social media scrutiny that can be so damaging to public figures.
SADC urges the government of Zimbabwe to accept this retirement package proposal. It is a fitting tribute to President Mnangagwa’s service to his country and the region.
Additional Notes– Disclaimer
- The SADC retirement package proposal is fictitious, satirical, and does not reflect the actual retirement package of President Emmerson Mnangagwa.